OK, this might be the dumbest topic I've ever written about in this space, but today, I want to write a little love poem to Subway. Yes, the chain of sub restaurants that everyone loves to make fun of, with Jared and the eating of fresh and all that crap. People dump all over Subway. I remember a while back there was the yoga mat chemical thing. Some people hate the smell of their bread. Or they just complain that they're chincy.
I've eaten literally thousands of meals at Subway in my lifetime. At least a thousand, anyway. There's a lot of reasons for that, but I guess the primary one is that Subway is kind of a gateway drug for me. You see, I have a fascination with filling my face with crap from fast food restaurants. I used to fantasize about Chick-Fil-A or Wendy's. I've written elsewhere on this blog about why, but part of it is the regularity, the predictability of it. Subway has that; anywhere in the country, or really the world, I can get a ham and cheese sub, and it's pretty much delicious. At least, if you like it once, you'll like it every time. But the difference is that Subway actually sells you things that look like they saw the ground recently. The produce is actually always amazingly fresh and crisp-looking. They have spinach and green peppers and olives. Most of the green peppers I've eaten in my life probably came from Subway. And, they tell you how many calories are in everything. Not because they have to, but because it's part of their shtick. If I'm in Jacksonville, for example, nobody lists calorie counts - except Subway.
Subway has been the backdrop to a lot of experiences in my life. I'm sitting there right now, typing this out. A surprising number of my blog entries have been written there. That's especially true in San Francisco, where there just aren't as many options for a quick, predictable and cheap meal that's reasonably healthy.
So, thank you, Subway. I am 100% certain that I am a way healthier person because you exist. Compared to what I would've eaten otherwise, you've probably saved my liver.